Presidential Water Fight
by ERmashfreak
Summary: What happens when the White House staff is without air conditioning on a hot summer day?


"You think we should?" Sam Seaborn asked. He was sitting in his desk chair with his feet up and his laptop in his lap. He was working on the President's State Of The Union Address as his best friend stood in the doorway of his office.

" 'Cuz it'd be hilarious and you could use a break. The State Of The Union is like a year away, Sam. You don't have to start it again for a couple of months," smiled Josh Lyman, as he gave this smile, which well, meant mischief. 

Sam let out a small sigh and stood up form his desk. He knew that there was no way of getting out of this one. "Oh, alright. Let's do it. You got all the stuff?"

"Yeah, I've got everything squared away. Who should we get first?" Josh asked.

"Josh, you're suppose to have this all figured out. Let's get CJ and then Toby,"

Josh nodded. Sam followed Josh into his office and Josh went behind his desk and opened a drawer. Josh pulled out two water pistols. He tossed one to Sam. 

"Let's get 'em," stated Sam. This was going to be fun. 

Sam and Josh carefully put the water pistols in their pant pockets. CJ was going to be pissed. Toby was going to go off on one of his rants. It was a really hot day, and the air conditioner, somehow, had broken over night and it was going to take about a week to fix. The background check on the repair people was going to take a few days because the FBI was running a little slow, due to people taking vacations at the same time. So, the air conditioner was broken, and as a result of the broken air conditioner, three things happened: 1.) Lights had been turned off, and it was relatively dark in the west wing area. 2.) Windows were left open, but with blinds shut to let some breeze in. If the correct number of doors are open in the white house, it creates some sort of wind tunnel in the west wing and oval office area, so the President made sure that the right number of doors were open all the time. 3.) Two of the senior staffers lost their minds for a few hours and they were about to have the rest of the staff join in. 

Sam left his suit jacket on the back of his office chair, and his sleeves had been rolled up on his white button down dress shirt, like he had been working really hard on something. The gel, that he put in his hair this morning, was now trying desperately to with stand the humidity, but gave up when a couple of strands popped up and wouldn't stay down after Sam pushed them back down.

Josh had his coat in his office too, but not on his chair. It was in his coat closet when Donna, his assistant, put it. Josh also had his shirtsleeves rolled up as well. Josh's hair was thick, but this morning, he had been running late and didn't have time to comb or gel it. So, it was all frizzy and going in every which way, except for the long pieces. Those stood on end or hung in Josh's face to hide his baby blue eyes and annoy him. His hair was persistent and made him groan in frustration every time he pushed the strands of hair back.

They approached CJ's office, casually, but carefully to conceal the water pistols in their pant pockets. 

"Have you ever done this before?" whispered Josh to Sam.

'Yeah, when I was little, we used to have these huge water fights on my street in the summer..." trailed Sam. He continued to talk, but he forgot that he had to whisper. Sam was so caught up in talking, that he didn't notice that Josh had given CJ a signal of some sort. CJ was watching from inside her office. She carefully opened her door, drew her huge super soaker and took careful aim. While she did this, Sam realized that there was someone behind him. He had heard the water splash around in the super soaker. CJ pressed the trigger, although it was virtually silent, Sam moved to the left on instinct. The water from CJ's super soaker flew past Sam and sprayed Josh.

"AHHHHHHHHHH! CJ! STOP! IT'S COLD!" screamed Josh, but it was too late, Josh was already soaked.

"I'm sorry! Sam moved!" CJ said. She turned to Sam, " Did I do good?"

"You did great. I couldn't have done it better myself," replied Sam. The two high-fived each other and then glanced at Josh, who's mouth was still hanging open and he was dripping wet on the floor. 

"Very funny you two, but I'll get the last laugh," laughed Josh.

Sam noticed that all of the assistants in the Communications Bullpen had mysteriously disappeared, " CJ, where did everyone go?" asked Sam cautiously. 

CJ looked around the room, " I don't know," she said very slowly. 

At that time, all the assistants jumped out from behind their desks and squirted CJ and Sam before they had a chance to go into CJ's office.

Meanwhile, in the Oval Office, President Bartlet was trying to read some polling data on potholes, but nonetheless, he couldn't concentrate because of Sam and CJ's screaming. 

"CHARLIE!" bellowed the President. 

A door opened and Charlie stuck his head in, " Yes, Mr. President?"

"Could you find out what all the screaming is about? I thought these walls were sound proof?"

"Yes, sir," Charlie closed the door and walked out of his office area. 

"Hey, Josh," Charlie said as he approached them, "What's going on? The President can hear you all the way in the Oval Office..." He paused, " Why do you have super soakers?" 

"Chippers, I'd run, if I were you," warned CJ. 

"Okay, I'll go tell the President that you're all having a water fi---," trailed Charlie. 

"Hold it! I got an idea," 

Everyone groaned because they knew that there was no getting out of this one. 

", Let's get the President." 

Of course, this was coming from a the mouth of a certain Deputy Chief Of Staff, who could only think hilarious, devious plans that would put anyone's job in jeopardy. That could only be, the one and only Joshua Lyman. 

"Joshua, Joshua, Joshua, Josh, can I call you Josh? Okay, that would be a good idea, except there's three small, major problems that you probably would never have thought of in that brain of yours," started Donna, "One, he's the President of the United States. Two, it would put your job in jeopardy. And three, the Secret Service, would probably, more then likely, accidentally, shoot you."

"Okay, Donnatella, if you wanna play it that way. One, he is the President; yes he needs to lighten up just a little. Two, he hasn't fired me yet. Three, we can tell the Secret Service that we're going to do this. The Secret Service won't shoot me because and I quote, "I don't have that kind of luck." That is what you said. Oh, two more things, you're fired and who's with me?"

"Impervious," replied Donna.

"You betcha," answered Josh. 

Sam glanced at Josh. Josh glanced at CJ. CJ glanced at Sam. They were going to do this. They were going to get the President.

Josh went to talk to Ron Butterfield, the President's Secret Service agent. Ron okayed it, but there was something about the look in his eyes. Josh didn't think much of it. CJ went to get Toby in on this. At first, Toby said that he "didn't want any part in this childish act of mayhem," but after much debating and then CJ's threat to with hold some things from him for an indefinite period of time, Toby, who was shocked by CJ's threat, changed his mind and CJ tossed him a super soaker.

Soon everyone was gathered in Charlie's office, since it connects to the Oval Office. Josh went over the plan, which was very simple, All eight of them, (Carol, CJ's assistant was home sick with strep throat) including Margaret (Leo's assistant) because she some how found out about this whole charade and threatened to tell if she wasn't included. The plan was simple enough, they were going to walk into the Oval Office, pretending to be there for a staff meeting and simply squirt the President. It sounded like a simple enough plan, but could they pull it off?

"Okay, he's coming down from lunch. He should be here soon," Charlie said, having the same grin on his face and Ron did. Josh was puzzled. He slowly looked at everyone and realized that everyone except Sam and him had the same grin. 

"Sam," Josh said, pulling Josh aside, " Did you notice the grins on everyone's faces?"

"No, don't worry about it. You're just being paranoid. Let's go," replied Sam.

Once everyone was in the Oval Office, they positioned themselves around the room, making sure everyone had a clear shot. CJ, Toby and Bonnie were at one end of the room and Donna, Ginger, and Margaret were at the other. Sam and Josh were seated on the one couch in the center of the room. Josh felt that this was a bit odd, but he didn't think much of it. Charlie looked out the window onto the portico, "Hey, the President's coming." But what Sam and Josh didn't know was that this was a set up. 

The President opened the portico door as Charlie left the Oval Office. 

"Good evening, Mr. President," chorused everyone. 

"Good evening," replied the President, " What are we all here for? CHARLIE!"

The door opened, "Yes, Mr. President," 

"Could you bring me a glass of water?" asked the President, winking at CJ. 

"Sure, Mr. President," replied Charlie. He closed the door and sat down on at his desk. The President had given him the signal and so he sat down at his desk and continued filling out forms for college. 

The wink was the signal to squirt Sam and Josh. She waited until the President was closer to his desk before she gave everyone else the signal. The President had moved a garden hose inside, behind his desk and had the nozzle turned to "off" CJ gave the President the signal and he pulled the hose out from behind his desk. At the same time, CJ and the others opened fire on Josh and Sam. 

            "AHHHHHHHH!" screamed both grown men. The two boys had been setup and were now dripping wet in the Oval Office. 

            Once everyone has stopped squirting each other, everyone was pretty wet. The President was the driest because he was the President and no one really squirted him as planned. Josh, Sam and Toby were the wettest. Sometime during the water fight, CJ had turned on Toby. After a few minutes of silence, the air conditioner mysteriously turned back on.

            A few hours later, Everyone had changed out of the wet clothes into dry clothes. Since Donna knew a dry cleaner that was always looking for business, she took all of the wet clothes to the dry cleaner. Everyone had a spare pair of clothes in their offices because sometimes you don't go home at a normal hour of the night and sometimes it's so late, that there is no point in going home for the night because in three or four hours, everyone would be back to work. 

            Soon, most of them found themselves in the old conference room, sleeping. There was an agent at the door because they didn't want to be disturbed unless it was a national emergency. CJ had told the press that it was a full lid and to have a goodnight. Toby and Sam had finished a draft of the President's speech for oil reform. Donna had gotten the clothes from the dry cleaners and everyone was in their dry pair of clothes. Bonnie, Ginger, and Margaret had gone home for the night because they have something that most people working in the White House have, a family.  Josh had well; done everything he was supposed to do in a day's work, which, what that was, wasn't really clear to him today or anyone else for that matter, but no body minded. They all had had fun in the water fight and vowed to do it again, some other time, perhaps in four years and on someone's lawn and not in the Oval Office. 


End file.
